It has been exactly a month since I lasted my blog. Don't know why. May be because I just thought that I was getting bored with it. But I am glad that I am posting a new one at least one month later. It has been a roller coaster ride this far.
Until a week back I never knew that I would be changing from habitat. and I did. It just took two days to decide, hint and shift. To an outsider it would have sounded as a hasty decision. But I did it. Managing food on my own. Well it is curd mostly and thanks to my office friends, I am getting good food mom which their moms prepare. I am just going through mixed feelings. I am even compromising on my studies.
Have a long way to go. Believing that God will take me in His palms and He will do the walking while I just stay cuddled in His arms...Amen

As usual my day started at 4.30 in d mornin not because I believe in the old adage 'early 2 bed and early 2 rise makes a man healthy wealthy and wise' but because of the fact that i can't manage studying on my own. Hence I end up attending classes.
Inspite of Chennai boasting to be a metro I find my village to be better when it comes to street lights. The lights are on in the night and switched off only when there is proper visibility. That is followed in my village and I think that is how it should be. Sadly that is not seen here in Chennai. The lights are on when not required and off otherwise. Can you believe it if I say that the sun has a rival at 9.30 in the morning. But the moon has to manage on its own at 5.30 in the morning when the sun is finding it hard to come out so early. I have to strain my eyes in the dark early morning hoping that I get classmates with me for company. The deserted streets of Chennai can be very unsafe and even scary at times.
After braving all odds you sit in the class hoping to bring a smile on your parents face once the results are out. But alas! It gets difficult when you try keeping your eyes open, finally realizing the art of sleeping with eyes open. Even worse is the realization that your day is going to be bad as your boss is going to be back after a trip, learning in the process the tactics to delay payment of his employees.

CROSSroads

Life can b so unpredictable. One moment you will in high spirits and the very next moment you will be thinking 'o o not again. Why is it going wrong again' . But I guess that is life all about. When your pillow gets drenched with tears, turn around and you will see that you are giving a hype to something that deserves so very little attention. Sounds all rosy rosy when the orator is one who is not going through a bad patch at the moment. But think about it if the person delivering such speeches is herself going through all this. No prizes for guessing who is going through all this.
I was thinking as to why things are not working out the way I wanted. Why am I at the receiving end all the time. And that is when God tells me that there are people who have gone through situations worse than this and He still gave them the strength to come out victoriously.
Not again... One more uninspiring talk...is what you will be thinking. Your choice.
My maid who is just 25years is already a widow with no kids. Her husband was too good it seems. Her childhood was tough. When she was supposed to be in school she was busy carrying sacks on her head to make ends meet. She did not complain. She does not whine either. I just felt so guilty that I claim to be a child of God but do not have the faith to trust Him. My God shall supply all my needs is what I should have thought. Instead......(well nothing new about it).
I know my Jesus will never let me down and He never has :-)

Life is good

There are people who can be really good and there are ones who can be good only when they are sleeping. Have seen only a handful who come under the 1st category and the crown to the second group normally is given to the employers. Man! They just love irritating you when you are working like a dog for them. And the employees are just their punching bags. You really try being calm and composed. But at times such verbal outbursts come all of a sudden that you are not prepared for it and you absorb it unknowingly and unwillingly. And all you feel like doing is to find the next punching bag to pass on the frustration. These are the times you think of goin 4 anger management and art of living classes.
At the end of all this I just enjoy when I emerge as the winner and he the LOSER. Life is actually good :-)

Jobless and so blogging

After joining for CA, I never had the slightest of doubts that life would become very hectic. Surprisingly I was right. Weekends had to be balanced among church, fun and studies. I didn't want to give up either of them. It became even more hectic because of this decision of mine. Everybody started getting concerned about my health also.
There were days when I just wanted to sit at home and pamper myself. Watch TV at home rather than going to multiplexes.
In the entire 20 years (I think so) of my office, we have never got 2 days holodays at a stretch unless a Sunday was following the public holiday. But you won't believe it when my sir gave all of us two days holidays for Pongal. It was all of a sudden. (Even my sir has become unpredictable :)). Wanted to go home. But no tickets. And me jobless.
For the first time I feel like going to office and being jobless rather than sitting at home and being jobless.
Results of my friends will be out soon and I am hoping that I will get a treat this time. Wishing them the very best. And I know that God has planne dthe best for all of them.

Unpredictable- just me or all of us

Well my friends claim that my blogs are totally unrelated. One may be about chauvinism and other mite turn out to be about our spiritual life. I am glad that I am being unpredictable. At times it is good when people keep guessing. I like it at least.
Talking about hockey. I really expected that after Chak De!India, we would start switching our love for cricket to hockey. I expected the same when suddenly all of us started following tennis. I was wrong again.The moment Sania Mirza started becoming unpredictable in her game, I realized that we were actually not following tennis but her.
And cricket...It was already predicted that India would be the champions again. But unpredictability prevailed. I thought again that after the debacle in T20 world Cup, we will start sparing time for ourselves and learn to play this rather than watch the game and allow the sponsors to make money through cricket and cricketers. But then it was too late to learn something new as the old saying goes "you can't teach an old dog new tricks"
Back to hockey... The players needed a mediator to get their dues. Its a shame that the national game is going through such crisis and that too when the World Cup is fast approaching. (Most of the 'non hockey followers' would not have been aware of the World Cup until this crisis.) I really hope that the players get their dues as promised and don't turn out to be just verbal assurances

21st century or 18th century

It is surprising that we are living in the 21st century. What has changed? Of course we have modes of communication that travel faster than our mind. Our lifestyle has changed. Our standards of living have changed. Gone are the days when mobile was a luxury. We cannot imagine a day without a mobile. Everything has changed except our mindset.
We still live in a male dominated society. Of course there are people to claim otherwise. But this is not a debate either. It’s sad that we girls still rely on guys for everything. We need them when we are concerned about our safety, when we don’t trust on our own potential and the list can go on. Even at our work places, the guys get preference. Is it because they are better than us or is it that girls cannot handle the stress? The answer is neither. Guys turn out to be politically right just for the sake of entering into the good books of others. And we just end up being left behind just because we are not diplomatic. As I say “truth is often a bitter draught unlike a sugared pill of falsehood”.
Our laptops will get updated with the latest version, our mobiles will be the latest model and even the clothes we wear will be trend setters. But only our mindset will be outdated.

Now or never

Another Sunday has just got over and with it comes the Monday blues. Woke up today hoping against hope that it was a holiday. Soon realized that truth never fails and I need to accept that I have six long days to overcome. Sunday is one day where I set apart my morning time with God (and I love every moment with Him) and I need to wait for another 144 hours for the next Sunday. The next question that would obviously crop up is “WHY IS God ignored on all other days”. That is the question that should be asked to all of us. Why is it that we have to squeeze in our time with God in our so called busy schedule when we are able to manage having time to pamper ourselves, hang around and chat with our friends. Often we compromise on our time with God as we take God for granted. We expect that God only watches and He will forgive us as He has been forgiving all these years, and we end up doing all the nonsense.
But again, just by sitting silently or reciting something, consoling ourselves in the process that we are praying, when we are actually summarizing and analyzing the day’s events in our mind, doesn’t make sense either. God is not a silent listener. Rather He is our friend ensuring that it is a two way conversation. As long as we keep assuming that it is a one sided conversation, nothing will ever happen. God speaks to us. But the question is how sensitive are we to His voice.
If God has been faithful to us all these years, why aren’t we?
Why are we not grateful to Him for all that He has done?
Why do we not stand for Him when others try questioning the existence of God when our God had never disowned us?
Why do we only smile when others mock God while we are ready to debate on all other irrelevant things endlessly?
What is expected of us and what are we doing? Stop being a child of God for name sake. Let’s do something for Him. Its now or never.

Weekend time...fun time

Well it is a Saturday and tomorrow a Sunday. It used to be exciting to me once. But I have got my doubts now. Time becomes a crucial factor once you join for CA. You have to make sure what your priorities are. The toughest thing is you end up compromising your time with God for the sake of those people who won't be there for you till the end of your life. But God continues to remain faithful. There are times when I have totally ignored Him because of my other commitments. But the consoling part is He still loves me.
One resolution (don't know if I can term it as a resolution) that I have made this year is to grow spiritually, to get closer to Jesus. But the question is how will others realize it. Show that Jesus lives in you by just questioning "is He expecting you to do this". There are times when I have realized that I am wrong. But my anger and ego ( thanks to the devil) don't let me to repent.
A Sunday tomorrow and I am excited as I know that He has planned something really great for me. Amen It is going to be a fun time with God

People who matter to me

Well thanks to Heena. She is really promoting my blog and has been instrumental in creating this blog. She is one person whom I have criticized a lot and she still remains thick skinned at least superficially. I must say that she has matured by leaps and bounds but only in some areas. At times I wonder how can she put up a brave face in the midst of all the problems she is going through. But then I have realized that life has taught the harsh things. We were once like minded. But I am not sure how much we are now.
Speaking of Sangeeta. I must tell, she is still a kid. But its surprising how she manages to console me when things go haywire in my office work. One person whom I can rely on when it comes to office work. I just have to tell her what has to be done and then sit back and relax.
Well these are the persons whom I associate with at least for six days a week. It can extend to seven days if we there is shopping or birthday celebration or even a movie.
Going out to meet a friend today. At times it is hard to understand what God has planned for others. You are so uncertain that you can't give any consoling words until and unless you are dead sure about it.

just a kickstart

Well it has been a long time since I have written something useful. Have got so used to sms language that what comes now is only short forms and abbreviations. Have got so used to sms language that I myself have created my own short forms setting trends for others to follow.
Never had a clue that I would be into blogging. Maybe time was a factor plus I was not ready to let know my thoughts to others. But noticed that many are into it including my sir who seems to have a very busy schedule. Can also give credit to Heena, my office friend who gave me the spark. I can also be assured of the fact that she will be a follower of my blog. Well my friend Deepak just asked me as to who all will follow my blog. But as mentioned before, I am not expecting many.
I myself am not sure as to how regular I will be into all this. Only time can tell.